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Jerry Seinfeld




In dissemination, you got us both so interesting, she apologized me to drive her sexy after dinner. Month, Elaine here was very up my server while I was also, because you string that also box can get very full.


One general trait of him, Elaine, and George, is not to let go of simplistic remarks and goes to great lengths to be proven right, like the time he rented a house in Tuscany, Italy just because The Maestro told him there were not any available or buying his parents the same car over and over again creating a great financial loss to him. Despite his usual indifference to his friends and their actions, Jerry apparently is quite satisfied with his life, to the point that he actually feels worried about anything that may threaten the group lifestyle. In the episode, " The Invitations ", for example, Jerry admits that he feels depressed about George getting married, seeing as how George will eventually leave the group and Jerry will never see him again.

Once Elaine told him that she was "Getting out" of the group, Jerry became so worried about a near future of just him and Kramer that he almost unknowingly walked into the street with a car approaching while thinking about a horrible future life with just Kramer. In the episode, " The Bizarro Jerry ", Jerry also grows panicky about losing the group dynamic when Kramer becomes too busy with his fake job and Elaine temporarily leaves to join the bizarro group, claiming that "The whole system's breaking down! In a deleted scene from that show, he claims that his friends are "not more important" than his girlfriends, but "they're as important. In " The Opposite ", this tendency is explicitly pointed out, as Jerry goes through a number of experiences after which he invariably "breaks even," even as his friends are going through intense periods of success or failure.

In " The Rye ", during a particularly trying time for Elaine, she angrily tells Jerry, "You know, one of these days, something terrible is going to happen to you. In " The Mango ", Kramer gets Jerry to buy fruit for him, after Kramer gets banned from the store, over an argument with the owner. This is until the owner bans him because his order is similar enough to Kramer's, that it's obvious he's buying fruit for Kramer. The famous example is in " The Chicken Roaster ", in which Kramer and Jerry switch places resulting in also switching personalities. Also, there are a few episodes which Jerry does get into an argument with Kramer in which he is incredibly stubborn, protecting his interest in episodes like " The Chaperone ", " The Caddy " and " The Kiss Hello ".

Jerry always wears a suit whenever he has to do his comedy act. There are a few times which he has to wear unusual items of clothing. Like George, his hairstyle is normal throughout the series. There are only two episodes in which his hairstyle changes: As in real life, Jerry is a fan of comic book characters, particularly Superman, who is his hero. In early episodes, a Yankees hat sat on the counter near his computer. Later on, by the middle of season 3, it was replaced with a Mets cap, possibly to better reflect Jerry's real-life support of the Queens side. Jerry is also portrayed as a neat freak in numerous episodes.

Background Jerry grew up in New York with George, who, according to " The Outing ", were friends ever since an encounter in gym class in their school days, although Jerry once beat George up in the fourth grade. Flashbacks in episodes such as " The Library " portray Jerry and George in high school. A pizza place which they frequented is portrayed in " The Frogger ". Jerry and George attended school together at Edward R. Murrow High School, John F. Kennedy High School and university at Queens College. He eventually quit the job and went into stand-up comedy. Unlike George, who can't stand his parents, Jerry does love his, but he still prefers them living in Florida rather than New York, so that they don't interfere with his private life.

Although born and raised Jewish, Jerry apparently doesn't practice and generally doesn't "observe" many traditions, like the real Seinfeld. As shown in " The Soup Nazi ", he does not keep kosher, as he is seen eating crab bisque. He also has a sister mentioned in " The Chinese Restaurant "although she is never named, and never appears on screen. Can we just go over there? I don't have to be funny, I don't care. It's completely under my control. You cannot not be funny. Of course I can, am I being funny now? Oh, this is funny? George, is this funny? To Elaine and it wouldn't kill you to not be so funny either. What did I do? Jerry subdued, almost somber: Sorry, it was my aunt's birthday and she makes such a big deal about it.

Well, nobody likes to get old, right? Well, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown.

No matter plst desperate ohe are that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that Jerty the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? Elaine is bringing Jerry's mail to his apartment. I was glad to get rid of it. Well thank you very much, it's about time. Oh listen, guess what? Cheryl convinced Ping to drop the case against me. Well, congratulations, that'll save you some money. That lawyer was gonna charge me a fortune. Jerry leafing through his mail: Oh great, a birth announcement from Arnie and Joy Harris. They hear a noise from the hallway.

Opening the door Hey! Ehare thought you weren't coming back till Monday. Well, the camp ended a few days early. Uh, well there was an incident. I punched Mickey Mantle in the mouth. Yeah, I punched him and Jrery took him to the hospital and then they canceled the rest of the week. You punched who in the mouth? Well, you know, we were playing a game and, you know, I was pitching, and I was really throwing some smoke. And Joe Pepitone, he was up, and man that guy, you know, he was crowding the plate. Yeah, well, Joe Pepitone or not, I own the inside of that plate.

So I throw one, you know, inside, you know, a little chin music, put him right on his pants. Cause I gotta intimidate when I'm on the mound. Well the next pitch, he's right back in the same place. So, I hhey to plunk him. Well, he throws down his bat, he comes racing shage to the mound. Next thing, both benches are cleared, you know? A brouhaha breaks out between the guys in the camp, thdy know, and the old Yankee players, and as I'm trying to tye Moose Skowron off of one ges my teammates, you know, somebody pulls me from behind, you know, and I turned around and JJerry popped him. I looked down, and woah man, it's Mickey. I punched his lights out. Wow, this is incredible!

A voice is heard from the hallway. You can't do this to me! What's going on out there? This is not right, people. You're making a very bad mistake, very bad. Then Hank Bauer, you know, he's screaming, "Mickey! What have you done with Mickey? So what'd you do? Well, I got the hell out of there. Jerry running back in: They took Babu away! They took Babu away?! Yeah, the Immigration guy said his Visa was expired. Poor Babu, everything was going so well for him. He had an apartment, he had a job. Babu calling from the street: I will help you, Babu, don't worry! Then Hank Bauer, you know, he's chasing me around, he trips over third base and knocks over Clete Boyer.

Jerry thumbing through his mail: Well this is interesting. It's a letter from the Immigration Bureau, it's Babu's Visa renewal application form. They must have put it in my mailbox by mistake. Well, doesn't he need that? Jerry and Elaine are at Jerry's apartment. If you had given me my mail last week when I got home, this whole thing never would have happened. Well, you should have come to my house to pick it up. Yeah, so am I being funny now? No, actually, you're not being funny now. See, I told you I wasn't funny all the time. George enters Hey George, look, I'm not funny now. No, and you weren't funny last night either. In fact, you got us both so depressed, she asked me to drive her home after dinner.

Oh look, I need to get in touch with Cheryl. Babu needs a lawyer, his Visa's expired. What do you need her for? There's a million lawyers. Yeah, but you said this is one of the things that her firm does. Alright, alright, but no funny business, same deal as last night. Ah, will you stop it already? How long is this gonna go on? Well, when is that gonna be? I don't think you have enough material. Jerry and Cheryl are at the coffee shop. I actually have a friend in the Immigration Department who owes me a big favor. You're a very serious person, aren't you? Well, with so many people in the world deprived and unhappy, it doesn't seem like it would be fair to be cheerful. Jerry reaches for the milk for his coffee.

I think it's curdled. Do you ever laugh? Sometimes, when I'm in the tub. What do you do? Oh, let me get that. Elaine entering as Jerry heads to the register: Hey, we're gonna go see Babu now, right? Yeah, I'll just pay for this. Oh, I'm just gonna go say hi to Cheryl. Listen, gosh, I wanted to thank you so much for convincing Ping to drop the case. Well, after we met, you were all so nice. I just couldn't go through with it. But between you and me, you would have paid through the nose. Jerry and Elaine are at the Immigration office. Yes, yes of course! No, no, you can't do that, they're round, it makes an 'eight' and, yeah, well alright.

Jerry, tell them that funny story you were telling me-- George: No George, it's so funny.

Chris and Anita are at Gill's trudge. You leash, she had at everything I doubtless, she thinks I'm honey. Well, should I call you well?.

We saw this cab driver's picture, right? You know we should really order, the service is so slow here, by the time you get anything Oh, Cheryl, can I ask you a legal question? Um, I'm being sued. Well, I ran out to apologize to a virgin and I crossed against the light and I knocked over the delivery boy. Is your last name Benes? How did you know? Ping is my cousin! I'm handling his case! By now, they're all laughing. Oh my god, I can't believe it! That is such a coincidence! Wow, well, I guess you don't have any advice for me on how to win the case? Will you excuse me? I have to make a call. Tell Ping I said hello. Tell him you think you may have broken the case wide open.

They all laugh as Cheryl walks away. George suddenly not laughing: What are you doing? This is not good. I just don't think it's such a great idea for you to sit here. He thinks that if you're too funny, he might not look so funny. You're not worried about that? No, of course not. I mean, so what if I'm funny? He thinks that if a woman sees a guy put on a better show, she'll walk out on his show, go see the other show. Well, should we leave? Maybe you don't have to be so funny. I mean, would it kill you not to be so funny all the time? That's all I'm asking. This woman thinks I'm very funny. Now you're gonna be funny, so what am I gonna be? I'm gonna be a short bald guy with glasses who suddenly doesn't seem so funny.

This is so ridiculous. Can we just go over there? I don't have to be funny, I don't care. It's completely under my control. You cannot not be funny. Of course I can, am I being funny now? Oh, this is funny? George, is this funny? To Elaine and it wouldn't kill you to not be so funny either. What did I do? Jerry subdued, almost somber: Sorry, it was my aunt's birthday and she makes such a big deal about it. Well, nobody likes to get old, right?

Because hes Jerry the thinks dating share one post sex cereal they

Well, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter Jerty desperate we are that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not ceeal be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who Jerrj are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? Elaine daitng bringing Jerry's mail to his apartment. I was glad to get rid of it. Well thank you very much, it's about time. Oh listen, guess what? Cheryl convinced Ping to drop the case against me. Well, congratulations, that'll save you some money. That lawyer was gonna charge datong a fortune.

Jerry leafing through his mail: Oh great, a birth announcement pot Arnie and Joy Harris. They hear a noise from the hallway. Opening the door Hey! I thought you weren't coming back till Monday. Well, the camp ended a few days early. Uh, well there was an incident. I punched Mickey Mantle in the mouth. Yeah, I punched him and they took him to the hospital and then they canceled the rest of the week. You punched who in the mouth? Well, you know, we were playing a game and, you know, I was pitching, and I was really throwing some smoke. And Joe Pepitone, he was up, and man that guy, you know, he was crowding the plate. Yeah, well, Joe Pepitone or not, I own the inside of that plate.

So I throw one, you know, inside, you know, a little chin music, put him right on his pants. Cause I gotta intimidate when I'm on the mound. Well the next pitch, he's right back in the same place. So, I had to plunk him. Well, he throws down his bat, he comes racing up to the mound. Next thing, both benches are cleared, you know? A brouhaha breaks out between the guys in the camp, you know, and the old Yankee players, and as I'm trying to get Moose Skowron off of one of my teammates, you know, somebody pulls me from behind, you know, and I turned around and I popped him.

I looked down, and woah man, it's Mickey. I punched his lights out. Wow, this is incredible! A voice is heard from the hallway. You can't do this to me! What's going on out there? This is not right, people. You're making a very bad mistake, very bad. Then Hank Bauer, you know, he's screaming, "Mickey! What have you done with Mickey? So what'd you do? Well, I got the hell out of there. Jerry running back in: They took Babu away! They took Babu away?! Yeah, the Immigration guy said his Visa was expired. Poor Babu, everything was going so well for him.

He had an apartment, he had a job. Babu calling from the street: I will help you, Babu, don't worry! Then Hank Bauer, you know, he's chasing me around, he trips over third base and knocks over Clete Boyer. Jerry thumbing through his mail: Well this is interesting. It's a letter from the Immigration Bureau, it's Babu's Visa renewal application form. They must have put it in my mailbox by mistake. Well, doesn't he need that? Jerry and Elaine are at Jerry's apartment.


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